Tell me about you

Back in college, my lecturer asked us one day to write a matrimonial ad. We were to write about us alone and not about the qualities we wanted in the other party. This was kind of disappointing but we started to write anyway. We had a few naughty descriptions. Some of my friends went on to write two or three versions. Each version was for a member of their family and how they would want to portray their daughter or sister. Some of my classmates included their community and religion in their description. I guess because I never associated myself with either, I wrote that I am an independent girl with a good sense of humour.

My lecturer later said that these descriptions were our image of us. That was our identity. Since then I wondered if the ‘matrimonial’ part was intentional. She could have simply asked us to describe ourselves or how we saw us. Do we have a compulsive need to pass-on what ever we believe as our own, to our children? Or may be this was her attempt to spice things up.

I am not sure if my lecturer’s theory was right too. Some of the girls who included community in their list are now married to men from other communities. It is also possible that their thought process has changed over the years though.

As for me, I grew up out of Tamil Nadu and I never had any affinity for it. I tried running away from being a “typical tamilian” or a “Catholic”, whatever that meant. But slowly I began to accept that there is a little of bit of ‘tamilness’ in me. I like tamil movies, songs and at home we eat mostly south Indian food. I do not know what is typical or untypical and above all I do not want to know. It just does not matter.

On a lighter note, there is a community on orkut called ‘Fraud Mallu’ and many of my keralite friends are part of it. It is a community for all keralites who grew up outside Kerala and who cannot speak Malyalam fluently. Guess that makes me a ‘Fraud Tamilian’.